It is time to name the things you have lost in emotions.
Name your pain or your fear.
Example: Deb naming her pain. I lost the shape of my body, by gaining unwanted weight. I never had like my body even as a teenager. I was ashamed of it no matter what I weighed. I could never measure up to wanting a body that was thin (in my own eyes and desires). Not good enough by being overweight. I blamed a lot of my problems on my insecurities of being overweight. Viewing myself as ugly, you don’t look good in clothes. No one can love a ‘fat person’. It is amazing to me how family members make fun of you when you are overweight, and this really hurts and puts a wrong message into the core of your thinking. I can forgive those who hurt me and move forward in my pain & fear. I realize now I do not need to compare myself to others in how my body looks. The media lies to us in proclaiming how we as women should look. I will not let this pain and fear touch me anymore, for not accepting how I am vs you need to look like this. These are what I call wrong hooks into your flesh. My fear was I can’t even lose weight no matter what I do, no matter what diet I have been on, no matter how much exercise I do. No matter how many times I kept trying to lose the weight on my own and then there is the shame that I carried with it. My bondage was weighing every day and thinking I am a failure. Jesus said you are not a failure Deb. So today I am opening up these emotions to my Jesus. Jesus I need you in these emotions. I surrender to you Jesus in thinking more about my weight, how I look, how I feel and how I always think about food. I want union with you Jesus in my spirit, mind and body for healing. Today I will surrender to you Jesus. 1. Find your emotions, they are the language of the soul. The cry of the soul. What are you feeling? Speak words to your emotions. Jesus come into the part of my soul that is in fear, anger, disappointment, shame. 2. Love God in your suffering. In your suffering you can develop a resentment or betrayal. Tell Him “I am so heartbroken over this. In this place I love you”. Bring this part of your soul into His Presence. Say “Lord I need you to restore my soul. I want union with you Jesus for healing in my soul. You have Jesus the healer of the soul, He will never leave you nor forsake you. Jesus put life into me! Let me flow with rivers of life. Rivers of living water will restore you as in the garden of Eden by The Presence of God, the restoring of healing power within you. Cry out for union for oneness. Jesus still heals the soul. Jesus put wind in my sails Now let Jesus into the need of the soul. Hard times require more than willpower. We are taught we need willpower because we want control. Give this control to Jesus. In the garden the wrong tree was chosen. We are in a world with an affair with understanding. Understanding does not heal, only God heals. The intimacy with God will bring healing. Understanding is highly overrated. Information does not heal. I can gather all the resources you can, but only God heal’s. Understanding does not heal our soul. John 15 I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing. Where are you preventing Jesus from coming into union with you? Denial heals nothing! Do you have unbelief? Do you not trust God to handle what you are feeling in your pain of emotions. Part of me believed God would help me lose weight and then part of me took it back and said I can do this by myself. God said Deb you only think you can be loved (by close family) if you are thin. You think you can only do better if you are thin. (Big lies from the enemy) Unresolved disappointment that leads to distrust, leads me to disillusion, to cynicism, to unbelief. Did God really say? (Ican take care of it myself.) Go to the beginning of where your emotion started. (My family calling me fat). Go back to the disappointment, heartache and open this part of the soul and say I need you here. ‘God come and rescue me here in this place - where it all started’. ‘I am longing for life to be good again.’ This will be the battleground for the heart. How you shepherd this precious longing. If you shepherd this at all, will determine your faith in this life and the life to come. This is a call to action. God where am I keeping you at arms length? Is God your plan B if so, He will take away your plan A (ex. I can do this on my own) Ezekiel - talks about idol in your heart and God will come after that. What idols do you have. (Mine I want to be thin, always about my weight). What I needed first was God and healing in the brokenness of this pain and fear. Psalm 73:24 But it is good for me to draw near to God; I have put my trust in the Lord God, that I may declare all Your works. It is time that I will trust God in my life, in this pain and fear. I will have no trust in mankind helping me or trust I can do this by myself. Stop worrying - it is a command. Example, worrying I won’t fit in, I will be made fun of (especially those close to me) I have to please others in my body image. Now apply information that can be used by the power of the Holy Spirit. It is ok to say no to others. It is ok to want to be healthy. I want to be around for awhile. No satan I will not entertain what you have said to me in the past. (No to the enemy) Jesus I need union with you - nothing else will do. Jesus help me on this journey of healthiness. He has made His people strong. Psalm 148:14 NIV God has asked me to change my daily routine. As I am doing this, I realize the closeness that I have with Jesus. It is really about pausing for a moment and let Creator’s sacred breath, breathe into me. To be in union with Him. (Remember it takes more than one to have union). This is a great time of connecting with the One who loves me deeply and who wants me to love myself deeply. A process that I look forward to with Him. 2-12-2023 Deb Miller Robinson - Eagle Warrior
I watch John Eldredge on You tube, who has a great book: Resilient
I am reading it, but great encouragement on healing you!.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kt6RbI82rBk